Insecurities, we all have them. Whether they stem from a lack of self-love and respect to comparing ourselves to others. In this post, I’ll be focusing on the insecurities of body image in my own personal experience and what I have noticed.

Social Media Skinny

Is it just me or are we constantly been shown skinny white girls with naturally “effortless” hourglass figures? With no stretch marks… from the flattering picture I chose as the cover you could say that’s me. But I took this picture at 9 am before I had eaten anything and having a light dinner the night before while sucking in my stomach. Bet my Instagram didn’t say that in the caption huh.

Social media, for me at least makes me feel isolated in how my body looks when it’s not posed. And this is coming from someone who follows barely any celebrities/ influencers. From a young age, the preferred trendy body type of “the time” is constantly being shoved in your face.

One thing about social media that bugs me especially when referring to social media skinny is that a majority of these images are photoshopped. You see a highly edited image that looked candied, but in reality, you never really know if what your looking at is real or not. As someone that is very entry level in photoshop, I’ve realized it’s not that hard to shave off some arm fat or make a part of your body bigger then than it actually is.

I think it’s great if you're comfortable in your own skin and want to post your body. It’s your body! But In the media we are constantly seeing this unreal social media skinny that is not real, what are my generation and younger comparing themselves to. At this point, I’m noticing more and more girls my age and specifically at my school using photoshop ( or other editing apps) to make their bodies look differently.

I’ve become the person all my friends ask if an image has been photoshopped. Yes my friends will send me classmates’ Instagram posts to figure out if its photoshopped. I feel bad. People feel so insecure about themselves that they feel like they need to look a certain way. It’s bad when even their eyes are a slightly different shade of blue and one of their arms are disproportionally skinnier than the other. There are so many different apps for these things. The thing is when the picture doesn’t even look like you it’s not as beautiful. The most authentic version of yourself is the best version in my personal option.

Negative Talk by Friends and Family

Growing up the women in my family call themselves fat. It’s constant with my mom and grandmother. Don’t buy that “it’s fattening”, “Do I look fat in this”? “I feel so fat” “ I look 4 months pregnant” “ I was so good today (referring to not eating sweets)” “We are going swimming tomorrow so eat light/ I’ll eat light”, “ are you sure you want to eat that, we had sweets yesterday”, “can’t eat that its almost summer” , “only obese people eat there”, “ that drink will give you diabetes”

What people don’t talk about enough is your a reflection of who you’re around and are listening to. When I was born, I didn’t think my body was gross or have a negative association with being called “fat”. We start to compare our body with others who compare there’s and talk bad about themselves. If you surround yourself with people who talk negatively about their body, don’t you think over time you’ll start to do the same. Personally, this is exactly what happened to me, I thought I was fat and not good enough. I couldn’t even tell you when it started, maybe around 9 years old.

One of my friends named Ruby has the flattest stomach and yes Im jealous but I don’t take it personally when she wishes she could change her body, because we all want what we don’t have, but one of her friends who doesn’t have a flat stomach but is the best type of curvy hates when she talks negativity about her body

Appreciating You- some tips

Starting to think about who your around that talks bad about themselves or you? start paying attention to how you feel when you’re with someone and if it’s not good. // say something about how when they talk bad about your body/ therires it’s really negative and unhealthy for you. if someones not willing to change or stop talking about a subject to help you be a healthy human then do we really need them around? if so just be counshue of th3e time you spend and give to them. It’s ok to cut or distance people out of your life. there’s a lot of temporary people that come in and out our lives… and that’s just part of the human experience boo.

Listen, this is not a switch in your mind that can change overnight, I’m still having trouble feeling confertbl;e in my own skin but your reading this so that means your trying to show up for yourself and take action about feeling good in who you are and who you want to become. that’s a badass win in itself!

Sunglasses: Warby Parker/ bathing suit top: old Topshop bottoms: old Victoria Secret Swim