Online school has officially started, and it is as rough as it sounds. I miss my friends, and I am looking forward to going back to school so I can see them. Last year I wanted to get into journalism so I could be a part of the school paper. Well I got in and and my 1st assignment was to pick five questions for this famous New York Times article called 36 questions that Lead to Love. The idea is after answering these questions between two strangers you can see if you are compatible. Our assignment was to pick five and answer. So here are the five I picked and answered.

“Would you like to be famous? In what way?”

I would not like to be famous. I think being famous would be harder to be authentic in the raw human moments everybody experiences when strangers are constantly documenting your every move. I feel like I wouldn’t ever feel free to dance around in the grocery store with my friends at 2 in the morning, and those are the moments I enjoy the most. Constantly being judged and put on a pedestal, does not seem fun per say.

 “If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?”

I would want to retain the body of a 30-year-old because not being able to be active would take a toll on my mental health. Exercising and getting dopamine is a big part of my happiness. Imagine your body feeling weak and hurting all the time from old age, that would personally slow me down both mentally and physically. 

 “When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?”

To be fully transparent the last time I cried was last night with my mom in her car. It was an ugly one too where my glasses were fogging up and I couldn't find a tissue.

I recently got used. I had to eliminate someone who was once important to me from my life. And now I just feel like an object even though the drama happened weeks ago. I told my mom about it a few days ago and she’s been emotional, which was making me emotional. So I got a good cry in. I'm over it but glad I got it out. (I know that's personal but I wanted to give contexts and be upfront because it's hard to have human connections online and this week has been hard on so many levels).

“If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?”

I’m a people pleaser, I put others' feelings first before mine and I don't deserve that. So If I knew I was going to die I would simply stop caring about how others felt, instead making sure I was good first. I should stop caring now. We only have today as a guarantee. 

 “What do you value most in a friendship?”

In all relationships you need one thing, a starting base of sorts to be sustainable long term, that thing is trust. Trust is the foundation of all friendships, so when you don't have trust in your friends are they actually even of value to you? Trust I think is huge. Otherwise, how could you be vulnerable or authentic with others without even the smallest ounce of trust. 

“Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?”

Weirdly, yes. I think I'm going to die of cancer suddenly because it runs in my dad’s side of the family and mostly women have had it. I’ve had intense dreams where I'm in the hospital, hysterically crying. I just remember crying over myself, not something bad that had happened to someone else, but to me. Finding out it's confirmed I’m not dying in a matter of decades but a matter of months. Death itself just freaks me out.

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